A Reflection on Being Butt-hurt.

Hey folks! I hope you’re having a wonderful weekend so far!

As a lil’ lady who is continuously learning about herself, it’s extremely hard to discuss topics that I’m still, well, learning about! It’s soul- baring, and I feel all vulnerable discussing it. I’d like to think I’m self aware, or at least know my own strengths and weaknesses in every day terms, but in a perspective concerning relationships- it’s still something that is developing all the time.

I pride myself on my independence, and being comfortable in my own skin. Which is very true indeed! As some of you know, I was a bundle of nerves and my anxiety was at it’s highest in college years. In other articles/posts, I have stated that it affected my Screen Shot 2016-04-17 at 14.56.11relationships, which it definitely did. I look back at that time now, and think how much of a different person I am now. I’m unashamed of my easy going attitude towards everything, I’m confident and chilled out in a mushy-cool combination (or at least I’d like to think so!), I go with the flow- if a guy comes along that I really like, sweet! If not, that’s cool too- because what will happen, will happen ❤ However it has been a slight downfall in relationships where my kindness/ easy going attitude has been taken for granted, or really taken advantage of. And that’s my reflection. It aint cool. It’s not 100% ‘rejection’, its someone manipulating the good within you for selfish reasons. I was butt hurt, and it succkkkkeedd. It hurt my lil’ soul.

Everyone has a fear of rejection/ feelings not returned, but it’s how you deal with it that determines the overall outcome. Learn from it, grow- but also let yourself feel! This has been on my mind from the experience. When someone betrays your trust, or plays on your personality, it flippin sucks. It sucks big time, no matter the circumstance. It’s alright to rationalise an experience by saying ‘some people are not meant to be in your life’ and ‘hurt people, hurt people’ (which are all very true sayings), you have to let yourself feel hurt. This, in my very personal experience, is something I’ve been working on. It feels uncomfortable and has a weird feeling in your stomach, but it’s so important to experience it (Psychologies has a great article about coming back from rejection here). It’s left me a little guarded as a person lately, but I’m taking it within my stride. We’re not all perfect people, it’s taken me a while to admit this butt-hurt. I’m still rolling with the punches and slaying my way through each week the best I can!

Remember, you’re growing as a human being every day. Every day. Sometimes, things don’t go the way you planned, and you have to be very mindful of your actions and reactions. Be gentle, be kind, be yourself. As much as being butt-hurt sucks, don’t react with anger or hate. Take a step back and remember your self worth, and treat the situation with as much goodness as you can. But also stand up for yourself too! ❤ You will come out of a bad experience with more perspective, ready to go with the flow of the world that awaits!

Anyway sweetpeas, I will leave it there ❤ sending all my love to you all!

 

 

 

 

 

Love yo’self

It’s either soppy couples or a Bridget Jones style of day, am I right? Well, kind of. The problem is with this type of day- we compare and in a way, tend to neglect ourselves if we do not have a significant other. We also tend to get real upset too, if there’s someone on your timeline who’s been proposed to, or being treated with so much love (that sometimes makes us cringe). We ask, why isn’t something like that happening to me? Why do I not have someone like that? I’m just sat here with my own Netflix and chill!

Notice what you’re doing. You’re sitting there ruminating over people that are, quite frankly, loved up. A day to celebrate that is wonderful you guys! Love is something we all deserve folks, whether we have someone to share today with or not. You flippin rule! Whether you are in a romantic relationship, single, not bothered, whatever; feeling real good about yourself, and accepting yourself is much a part of Valentines day, than all the rest of it.

You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire Universe deserves your love and affection ❤

 

 

Love Yourself

Hello you beautiful souls!
Ah, ‘love’. Probably the most powerful emotion we feel. It can be unconditional, potent and overwhelming. It sinks through our skin and pours out of us like some kind of tidal passion, which influences our lives whether we want it to or not. ‘Love makes the world go round’. They aint’ wrong.

It cannot be bought or sold; there is nothing it cannot face; love is life’s greatest blessing.- Catherine Wybourne

Such a powerful thing, yet when it comes to loving ourselves- we find it difficult and hard to do. We bruise our own capabilities, passions and aesthetics but find it easier to love and accept others. You are a source of wonderful things!! Love, forgive and accept. Create a strong relationship with yourself, and love will come back to you in abundance ❤

Knowing Your Self Worth

It’s been a while folks, so I do apologise. Even though I’ve been feeling really good lately (actually, really really good)- I must admit there’s been a lot going on in my personal life, as well as finishing my degree (everything to be handed in, in 14 days!) so I haven’t had time to blog.
However, there have been events that have been swirling around me that have been varying in the negative to the extremely positive. It made me realise how much power you can give to others to make you happy.

You really and truly have to ask yourself if the people around you are making you happy. Do they care for you as you care for them? Do they put out what you give in to a relationship? Is it a balance, or is it weighing you down? Do you make yourself happy?

The hardest part is admitting it. The next hardest part is doing something about it.

Situations and events that seem to be confrontational or hard to have, have the power to make you ‘lose your shit’. You say things you don’t mean, you shout and get angry and find it hard to respond in a conversational way.
For me, I’ve never been one to lose it completely, in fact I’m very much a calm and understanding person. Which to some, may seem quite frustrating! But not everyone is like that. Some people do not know how to express themselves in a way that does not hurt the other. Even if the topic is hard to discuss, there’s so much emotion behind it- that you practically word vomit (and nobody wants that right?)

Step back from the conversation, take a few deep breaths and then talk.

If you’re not with people who push you and support you through whatever you set your mind to, they are not worth your time. You have to know your self worth to understand completely what the friendship or relationship means to you. You don’t have to end something completely if you do not want to, you can take a break, tell them how you feel and see how they respond. If you feel it needs to end, then that’s ok too. Also, the most important part, is that you don’t have to say things in a mean way. Being confrontational does not mean you have to be aggressive about it. Hard talks are at the end of the day, the honest ones.

Some people have all different paths to take, and some people grow at different rates. Paths may cross, and some will grow together. Be accepting of someone else’s path, and let them go on their own journey. Do not be afraid of knowing what you are worth and the change that can happen with it. Do not be afraid of the emotions that go along with change too. Let yourself feel. Whether it’s happiness, sadness, guilt, love etc. Sit with it, notice and see what is happening for what it really is.

Being accepting is a hard thing to do, but something that resonated with me is that ‘Hurt people, hurt people’. Be as compassionate as you can, even in the toughest of times.

Love yourself, and accept yourself before you love and accept other people.

Sending all positive vibes to my followers ❤

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